I am not writing this piece for sympathy or a pity party thrown in my honor. I just felt that since tomorrow is September 21 I had to mark the occasion somehow. September 21st is the due date of the baby that we lost. A sad day for the Yeates family, but it also makes me realize how blessed I am and lucky to have such a supportive family. My mom was my rock during that time and my sisters and dad were there to listen. And of course Jesy who spends so much of his waking hours trying to make a happy life for me.
The kids knew what was going on and Colin and Amalie were especially upset by the news of the lost baby. Colin decided that the baby had been a boy and named him Jack. It kind of stuck with me and when Colin and I talk about him we call him baby Jack.
Fast forward many months later and in late June we had to put my very favorite cat Muggles to sleep. It was not an easy decision and I still miss him here in Russia. When I came home and broke the news to the kids I will never forget what Colin said- "I think Baby Jack and Peanut (another lost cat) were there to meet Muggles in heaven". I think my heart skipped a beat- what mother could ask for a more kindhearted son.
I hope Colin will read this some day and know how much I treasure his very big heart. Colin often sees the world quite differently than I do and he gets me through the tough spots.
Baby Jack- the child I will not get to hold until (hopefully) I have lived many years on this earth. But I feel such peace knowing that you are safe with God and being watched over by Muggles and Peanut. I know you are in safe hands.
This was really sad to read and remember with you and at the same time I am so glad that you wrote it. It is one of those incidents in life that always stays with you, even if you are lucky enough to have another baby or have one or two already. Thinking of you.
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